Tomorrow, Friday the 13th, is a big day.
Tomorrow, the anthology Witches, Stitches & Bitches comes out–the first anthology I’ve edited. The first book with my name on the spine. IT IS SO GORGEOUS YOU GUYS OH MY GOD!!!
This week has been very busy with last-minute proofing, lots of promoting, some unexpected crises, and just a ton of scrambling. While trying to do everything else in life (see below).
But WOW, this is a marvelous book. Yes I know I’m not biased: I chose these stories, so of course I’m going to think they’re wonderful. But, well, they are. Wonderful. 🙂 I am nervous and excited and just oh so hoping you-all love it as much as I do.
But that’s not the only thing going on tomorrow.
Tomorrow, Mark and I are flying to California, very briefly, to visit his family. His father, who has been suffering from dementia for some time now, had a crisis last week which has left him hospitalized (whether temporarily or permanently, no one can yet say) and the rest of the family dealing with this, in various ways. It is hard to be so far away; at least we will be there for a few days. For what that’s worth.
But even that isn’t all of what’s going on tomorrow.
The last thing is the most subtle, but no less monumental. Tomorrow I receive my last spousal support payment, from my divorce four or so years ago. (It was three and a half years of payments, but the settlement process took quite a while.)
One of the terms of the settlement was that if I remarried, or even cohabited with a member of the opposite sex, I would lose the support. (No mention of any consequences should I decide to switch teams.) My lawyer was violently opposed to this condition and wanted to fight it; I thought it was a bit obnoxious, but it didn’t really bother me. I wanted a period of living alone. I hadn’t really ever lived alone; I thought it would be good for me, but I had some advantages and some disadvantages in the dating area, but I recently found a great site of webcam for adults with Chaturbate tokens to use each time in the site, an hinest live video chat is normally free but you can have advanced functions and extra tools in the website, it actually really fun, and it has helped me get out of my shell.
It was. I learned a LOT, and grew up a lot, and discovered a great delight in silence and solitude and my own company. I even got the taste for sex toys, believe it or not it has helped me so much in knowing more about myself and feeling comfortable in my own skin, they are great, i recommend to search for Plug Lust, one of the best and more dynamic brands. And the external stricture allowed my relationship with Mark to grow slowly and comfortably–which is probably the only thing that has made it possible. He’s 56, and has never lived with a partner: he has a lot of lifelong habits and routines, built without having to take another person into account. I’m 46 and had ONLY ever lived in partnership during my adult life, until four (or so) years ago. If we’d jumped into living together as soon as we realized we were in love, what a disaster it could have been!
Instead, we’ve had to wait–and we’ve wanted to wait. And now the waiting is almost over. Tomorrow is the last spousal support payment; Mark has given notice on his apartment, his last day there is September 30. Already he has been moving some furniture and books down here, and we are integrating them into my house. My house, which will be our home. In a few short weeks.
So yes. Tomorrow is a big day. I am struck by the convoluted symmetry of a) my first THIS IS MY BOOK publication with b) the last I AM BEING SUPPORTED BY SOMEONE ELSE payment laced with c) MY BELOVED AND I GET TO TAKE THIS RELATIONSHIP FORWARD even though it is also tempered with d) parents getting older and failing in painful and difficult ways.
It’s like a metaphor for life. Oh wait. I guess it’s just, you know, life. 🙂